Interview taken ( & edited ) from HermAphrodite #9.

The first time I ever saw Lee Mack, he was acting as compere for the Channel 4 stand-up series, ‘Gas’. ( The first time I ever saw Noel Fielding was on the Lee Mack compered Channel 4 stand-up series, ‘Gas’. )

“Two blind fellas walk into… a wall.”

The first time I ever saw Lee Mack live, he was dressed up in little shorts and suspen-ders and a horrible snake-skin jacket, wibbling around with The Mighty Boosh, running off with Noel Fielding’s VERY tiny wife. That was several months ago, but for some reason, the image has stuck.

“I actually got mugged in Limerick – the place, not the style.”

And ( thusly ) assured of the quality of his material, I get myself and a small posse together to see him return to play at the bright ‘n’ shiny Arc in Stockton on Thursday 18^th November. And as Thursday 18^th November is my 21^st birthday, I’m a leetle peloothed before we actually get to the building. Which is why; a) you have this interview at all ( I just got some to take me backstage and then I started talking ), b) it wobbles around so. There is little explanation however, as to why initially we discuss his cat ( which apparently looks a lot like my mogwai ), Scandinavia, little shorts, the new management in The Arc and canoeing. And then I finally tweak myself around to asking when and why he found himself doing comedy…

Lee – “I was in millions of dead-end jobs until I was about twenty-six, I didn’t do any stage-work at all. ( pause ) Though I’d been at Pontins.”

Me – “Does that count?”

Lee – “It does count a bit. It wasn’t what I wanted to be – an entertainer – it was just a good job.”

Me – “You watched ‘Hi De Hi’ and thought: ‘That’s for me!’”

Lee – “That was it. ( pause ) So I did that for two years, and then I had about five years off just doing a dead-end job, and then I just started it in London. I went to a bad comedy night and thought, ‘I could do this’.”

So he did.

Lee – “And look at where I am, five years later. In Stockton.”

( Not quite what he meant when thinking ‘I want to go far!’ )

Lee – “Sometimes I’ve been in very surreal situations – usually if it’s something to do with TV. Probably the biggest audience I’ve ever had was when I did The Des O’Connor Show. And that was a bit surreal. Just suddenly thinking ‘What am I doing here on this show with famous people?’ I was on with Peter O’Toole and ( he thinks about it ) Jennifer Lopez. It almost becomes just… silly.”

And then Kathryn Tate appears. She’s his support act this evening. Introductions are exchanged.

Lee – “She’s a woman, but she’s good.”

He’s just joshing. He’s worked with her before. On a show called ‘Lee Mack’s Bits’. ( And wouldn’t say such as thing in cold blood misogynism if he wished to work with her again. )

So was she playing the part of his foil onstage?

Kathryn – “Not really, no, that would be ungenerous to Lee. There was a lot of times when… I was a lot funnier.” She too is just joshing there. Probably best. Though they are going up next year with a different show wrapped up in the same format. Which should be good. ( And ‘big and beautiful’, I am assured. )

And then we’re interrupted by a man who wants to know if they have any objections to a table-to-table drinks service. ( “They’re pretty subtle,” assures the member of staff. “They duck a bit,” I remonstrate. ) And then Lee gets the urge to use metal and steam.

Lee – “As we’re chatting, can I iron my shirt?”

I agree. But only if I can take pictures. And ooh, the shirt itself is worthy of a photo collection to itself. It’s bright, it’s glittery, and it says ‘Aloha’ in sequins across the back. Oh my. I ask whether this is evidence of a theme to the evening.

Lee – “I’m a Hawaiian act.”

Me – “So are you going to be on in a grass skirt as well?”

No. For one thing, he wouldn’t know how to iron it.

Lee – “You two are ladies, tell me – if you iron on top of sequins, will they melt?”

We assure him he should be safe if he irons it inside out.

And so to return to the interview. Right. Has he had people recognise him from Des O’Connor? Are Lee’s basic audience largely a chatty and appreciative one?

Lee – “It’s weird. I did a TV show called ‘Gas’, and when it was on, I never used to get recognised. Ever. Twice, at the most, in two series. And yet since it’s been finished, I’ve had LOADS of people say things. I think it may be if you’re on TV at the moment people won’t say anything to you because they’re too embarrassed. But if you’re not, it’s almost like – ‘Oh it’s that bloke that used to do that thing. When he had a career.’ I think they’re pleased with themselves for remembering the name of the show, for telling you that they watched it. If they came up to you the next day they’d just feel a bit stupid.”

So does he miss doing ‘Gas’? ( Not for the attention, certainly… )

Me – “For the money, and then the being-on-telly, and then the doing-what-you-wanna-do-and-getting-paid-for-it-in-front-of-a-large-audience…”

Lee – “We’ve been doing a show together, so with working on that and the Edinburgh Festival, I don’t. I don’t miss it. It’s not like it was a massive viewing figures show – in effect it was only really like doing a live gig that was televised. If that makes sense. I’d do it again if they asked me – I’d do anything. But I like going around the country, giving something back to people. If I can just make one person smile…”

I interrupt the sincerely meant but insincere sounding flow to ask if he’s ever been mistaken for anyone else. Stewart Lee, for example, gets confused with Mark Lamarr, Terry Christian, Roland Giff, Leonardo DiCaprio and Eastenders’ Mark Fowler, among others. And there’s a person in the audience this evening who honestly expected to see Lee Hurst onstage.

Lee – “I get Brad Pitt.”

No. Not really. He’s just joshing.

Lee – “I’ll tell you who I have had, seriously. Onstage people have shouted out ‘Tim Roth’ a couple of times.”

Which I can see. More than Brad Pitt, anyway.

Lee – “And a young Roy Castle.”

This I find very funny. He starts singing the ‘Dedication’ song. His prowess on the trumpet however proves he is a different person.

Lee – “I’ve also had a young Peter Mandelson. ( pause ) Well, when I say I’ve had him…”

He wiggles his eyebrows at us. And keeps thinking. Until inspiration strikes.

Lee – “Oh, I’ll tell you who I did have, seriously, and this is not a lie – I’ve had someone come up to me and ask if I’m Stewart Lee. I’ve had people mix up faces, but never names. So I said ‘Yeah, yeah I am’. Stewart Lee! I mean, how UNLIKE Stewart Lee do I look?”

Mmm-hmm. Exactly. Lee Mack is a man who can, if he scrunches his face up in the right way, pass for Stan Laurel. As I have pictures to prove.

Lee – “And Noel Fielding thinks I look like a 1940’s grocer.”

This I also find very funny.

Me – “Do you play up to that when you see him?”

Lee – “What, by selling fruit?”

Me – “In a 1940’s style, yes.”

Sadly, no.

Me – “So what do you say back to him, do you have a banter going on…?”

Lee – “I’m a lot clever than him, I just say ‘Shut up, you look like a girl’.”

>>> Part 2

Last revised: 15/07/01